30 Days of Me: Day 4

Because I missed that post yesterday, I’m doing two to catch up.  So without further ado, here is Day 4!

Day 04- A habit that you wish you didn’t have

This is a tough one.  I have several wee habits I want to work towards changing.  But I think the one I need to focus on the most, the most damaging one to me, is allowing myself to feel that I am somehow a burden on the people in my life, that I am annoying.  I struggle with that one all the time.  Because I am a true extrovert, I am loud, passionate, boisterous, child-like, outgoing and love everything that has a sense of theatricality.  When my head is not in a good space, which I do struggle with fairly often, I convince myself that I am annoying or too much trouble for people.

I need to regularly remind myself that this is who I am, and where I don’t expect anyone in my life to change for me, I have to give myself that same courtesy.  I don’t need to change for anyone – those who like the person I naturally am will always gravitate towards me, and those that don’t will gravitate away.

But it’s not easy when I have a lifetime of being told that the very things that make me uniquely me are annoying or unacceptable.

I will keep working at shifting this habit, but it is one that I wish I didn’t have.

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September 19, 2010. 30 days of me, Meme.

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